How about a contest?

[♫.Starredmyst]

Risingdawn smiled slightly as Snowsong spoke again, glad to at last coax something out of the reserved she-cat; his eyes were still locked on the sunset, and he hadn't noticed the white cat's flash of unhappiness.

"I've always liked sunsets, myself," he agreed. "It's beautiful, and it's a reminder that there's something more out there...that you're small enough not to be responsible for anything, but important enough that you're allowed to see such a beautiful spectacle."

He let out a little chuckle, and relaxed once more; his gaze dropped back down to Snowsong, although he didn't quite meet her eyes. She had pretty fur. He was content to look at just her fur for now. "I'm sorry, I'm just full of flowery speeches tonight, aren't I? I don't often have the chance to say stuff like this without getting odd looks."

[.&&. Snowsong.]

Snowsong calmed down and relaxed, and she allowed a faint smile to play at her lips as Risingdawn spoke again. "Yes, its always beautiful..." She got to her paws and lifted her gaze to Rsingdawn. She noticed that he was gazing at her fur.

Snowsong allowed a faint chuckle to escape her maw as Risingdawn spoke again. "It's fine. You seem more intelligent like this than when you stutter and search around for words." She got to her paws, and she launched herself gently onto the rock. She settled down beside Risingdawn, and she felt her pelt faintly brush against his.

[♫.Starredmyst]

Risingdawn laughed again at Snowsong's comment; laughed at himself, but not in a self-deprecating way. He moved over a little as Snowsong leapt up, but not so far over as to put much space between them. There wasn't much room on the rock, after all.

"Believe me," he said wryly, "none of that's intentional. I'd really like to blame my sister for making me seem like an idiot by being an idiot, but I don't like to lie, either."

He fell silent again, but it was a comfortable silence this time. The sun inched lower on the horizon. The ginger tom found himself debating; wondering if he should once again try to bring words to the way he was feeling tonight, risk sounding foolish or saying the wrong thing, or just let it lie and hope Snowsong understood without him saying it.

But his tongue was running loose tonight, and before he could clamp down on it he was speaking again.

"I'm going to tell you a secret, Snowsong," he said, recklessly. His eyes traced the vein of the granite boulder, because he was afraid of showing the war they would reveal -- the battle between a hard, old anger and a new emotion he didn't know how to deal with. "This is the first -- no, you know what, I'm not going to lie to you -- you're only the second cat I've ever been able to spend a day like this with. It's -- I don't know how to explain it, Snowsong, except to tell you there's no way I'd want my sister to know about today. She'd either laugh her head off because it's about time I stopped worrying about being an idiot, or she'd go to find you and kill you because -- she's my sister and she worries, even if she doesn't admit it."

As suddenly as he'd spoken he fell silent and fiercely trained his gaze on the boulder. Stupid, stupid. He'd just opened himself up to a world of scorn from this she-cat, and even if she didn't think he was pathetic, he'd probably said something that would hurt her and make her hate him. Why did he even try?

[.&&. Snowsong.]

Snowsong's ears flicked slightly with some bliss as she heard Risingdawn say he didn't like to lie after he said something that would make her mother's day. It wasn't actually enough to make her own day, but oh well, being around him seemed to begin to make her day.

Snowsong then felt some sorrow force its way into her as Risingdawn said his last few statements. She lowered her head slightly and turned her gaze to her paws, which were nearly completely hidden by her tail. "Oh, I don't mind your sister hunting me down...I'm used to people trying to get rid of me..." Even the ones I was close to...

[♫.Starredmyst]

"No -- wait --" Risingdawn cursed to himself; he had said the wrong thing. "Snowsong, no, that's not what I'm trying to say! Silv is -- she doesn't know you, if she thought you weren't, well, if she didn't think you were right for me to hang around with she'd probably come raring out, yeah, but -- she's a good judge of cats and she'd like you...StarClan, why am I saying this? I'm sorry. Forget I said anything. I'm just babbling. Please --"

He looked straight at her, hopelessly, because she'd turned her eyes back down to her paws and he was beginning to recognize that as a signal of her unhappiness. He didn't even know what he'd been trying to say -- why had he let it out of his mouth? Now he'd hurt her and he didn't know how to fix it, had no idea what to say.

[.&&. Snowsong.]

"No, no, it's fine...I understand...I understand other cats if they dislike me...I've gone through it a lot, so I'm used to it..." Snowsong locked her gaze on her paws. She knew Risingdawn was likely beginning to feel guilty, but she couldn't help it. She liked his personality, she liked his gaze. It seemed that she liked him. And now, she found out that she may be rejected by his sister, and she may never be able to spend time with him again.

"Listen, Risingdawn, it's alright. If your sister doesn't want me to be around you, I'll be fine. As long as the memory of this day remains vivid..." Snowsong shifted uncomfortably for second, and she pulled her tail closer to her body. She felt as if she was vulnerable to pain now, and she didn't like it.

[♫.Starredmyst]

"Snowsong, stop it."

Risingdawn's voice was a little angry, tinged with a sort of desperation. "That's not what I'm saying. Stop trying to take it that way. Silv doesn't dislike cats without a reason and -- and listen, she cares about me and she worries, that's all. If she gets to know you she'll be laughing at us right and left and doing her honest best to egg us on, I swear it. It's not -- I was trying to make a joke and it came out wrong, okay? I..." He faltered, fiercely stared away at the sunset because his eyes were burning.

"Please, please don't say you're going to -- to stop talking to me or something, just because of what I said. Silv doesn't rule my life. I can be who I want to be. I was just trying to -- tell you how I feel. And -- and I'm sorry."

[.&&. Snowsong.]

Snowsong rested her head on her paws. "Alright...I understand..I apologize for getting you worked up like that..." She mentally cursed herself. She felt like she was beginning to go nuts, all because the shattering of her heart and soul in her life.

Snowsong dug her maw into her tail. "I apologize...For taking it that wrong way..." She felt embarrassed and frustrated. Stupid me. Stupid, stupid... She tried to brighten up, which she was able to accomplish slightly.

[♫.Starredmyst]

"Don't -- apologize...it's not your..."

It was no use. Riss had completely lost the thread of his earlier eloquence along with any control over his tone of voice. Miserably he shut up and laid his head down on his paws. It had been going so well.

It was getting darker. Stars were beginning to peek out in the blackness that was growing behind them, but there was still half a golden globe playing hide-and-seek with the clouds on the horizon. Risingdawn stared out without really seeing it anymore.

"Sun's almost gone," he sighed after a moment, because suddenly there was nothing else to say.

[.&&. Snowsong.]

Yeah.... Snowsong lifted her gaze and turned it to Risingdawn. "You want to go back to camp when it gets dark, or do you want to stay with me out here after it gets dark..? She couldn't help but feel slightly nervous. She had already upset him slightly a moment ago, and she didn't want to make him upset again.

Snowsong kept her head in the fur of her tail and paws. She couldn't help but examine Risingdawn's features slightly, especially his gaze and fur. She had an urge to become younger again and play around with him, but she resisted.

[♫.Starredmyst]

"Well..." Risingdawn flicked his tail in an 'I-don't-really-care' gesture, awkwardly looking for the right response. There was a residual sort of unhappiness still lurking around from his outburst, and at the same time the last thing he wanted to do was upset Snowsong again.

"Whatever you want," he said at last, uncertainly; it seemed like the best answer. He wouldn't mind staying out, but -- would Snowsong want to?

You're so possessive, Risingdawn. Suddenly it's not a matter of how to get in the right words to protect yourself, it's a matter of you don't want to hurt her feelings. You can't read her mind, maybe she's offended, or angry, not hurt. It's not like you own her. Why don't you just let it go?

He closed his eyes, briefly. After all, I did say just the right thing to mess things up already. My first time when I'm the one worrying instead of the other cat, and I say the wrong thing -- that must be a surefire sign of things soon to blow up.

[.&&. Snowsong.]

"I want your opinion, Risingdawn...I don't want to force you...Even if I could use that as the prize for the contest, I won't." Snowsong's tail flicked slightly. How wonderful, he hates me now... She awaited nervously for his response, hoping he wouldn't snap.

Oh, great, Snowsong. You upset him so much, he doesn't care. Nice going on the shattered soul taking over part. Ridiculous. Come on, just use the prize! Snowsong inwardly shook her head, saying 'I'm not so unfair.'

[♫.Starredmyst]

"Well, I mean...I was kind of hoping we could stay out, if you don't mind. If you're not -- I mean -- I'd rather stay out, but if you want to go back to camp, that's fine too..."

Risingdawn's tongue stumbled over itself and, mercifully, he stopped talking. He was very much now in the mood to curl up hidden in a corner and tell himself off, but if he didn't try and fix things now they never would be.

And anyway, he'd wanted to stay out very badly a few minutes ago. He was just feeling a little awkward again, was all.

[.&&. Snowsong.]

"Alright." Snowsong realized that Risingdawn made the decision right when the sun went dipped behind the Earth. The sky began to darken, and the SilverPelt began to shine down. She got slowly to her paws. She then launched herself gently off the rock.

Snowsong landed silently on the ground, and she turned to wait for Risingdawn. At least things are better now...A little.... She was still troubled by their conversation a while ago, and she could tell Risingdawn was as well.

[♫.Starredmyst]

Stars glittered in the sky above as Risingdawn launched himself down off the rock, landing with a little less grace than Snowsong had. Cold stars; he'd never felt the closeness to them some cats claimed. Stars were stars, and if the ancestors did look down from them like a few cats still pretended, they certainly weren't watching him.

It was beautiful, though; Riss had a fine appreciation for beauty, and wasn't going to deny that.

They would be leaving the fish behind, then -- Risingdawn hesitated, then walked over and buried them a little deeper. They'd make a nice breakfast for the Clan, or a midnight snack; they'd still be fresh enough in the morning, with the weather chilly as it was. That done, the ginger tom returned to Snowsong.

"Have you got anywhere in mind to go, or shall we just take a walk along the water's edge?" he asked. His voice was a little more casual and he was with an effort getting past the self-deprecation business, but he was keeping a tentative distance between his flank and Snowsong's.